The Cushing Treasury of Eccentric Haiku

A Note About The Cushing Treasury Of Bizarro Haiku:

I originally wrote these haiku for the story blog Every Tree Has A Face.  They’re me at my most spontaneous (most of them took about 15 minutes — some only 15 seconds — to compose).  Enjoy!

Dissatisfied Customer

Thomas Ligotti

does kids’ parties on the side.

(my son cried for days).

Her Testimony Against The Restraining Order

Yes, I know he is

cryogenically frozen

But Walt Disney’s Hawt!

Blam!

Duck see Zen Rabbit.

“See zen, Duck?” “See zen, Rabbit!”

See Zen Duck see zen

No Animals Were Killed When She Whaled On That Dude’s Hiney

Once my friend dated

a vegan dominatrix.

Bitch liked her pleather.

The Adventures Of See-Monkey:  The Mandrill With X-Ray Vision

Whatever you do,

don’t dare peel that banana.

There’s a turd inside!

Retiring From Track & Field, The Tortoise Goes To Work For The CIA (Where His Pace Is An Asset)

There’s a tortoise here

ripping off my lips, and I

wish he’d won that race.

Cosmetology Hijinks At Einstein’s Autopsy:  An Alternate History

If, on the morgue slab,

they’d dyed his hair pink…Voila!

The World’s First Troll Doll

Want more Bizarro poetry?  Check out Kevin Donihe’s new collection, The Flappy Parts, at Amazon.com

1 Comment

  1. Sean said,

    December 7, 2011 at 2:36 am

    I’d have Thomas Ligotti do my kid’s party.
    This is why I shouldn’t have children.


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